Motivation

How to Kick Your Limited Belief to the Curb!

We can all become healthier and get closer to our goals — Anyone!

It doesn’t matter what you have done in the past. It doesn’t matter if those things worked for awhile then fizzled out. It also doesn’t matter what’s coming up in the future such as vacations, weddings, birthdays or the kiddos going back to school. ANYONE can do it!

I’d like to point out that their’s also nothing horribly wrong with you if you haven’t figured out how to do it yet! Losing weight or hitting your fitness goals (whatever they may be) is a loaded topic! There’s a TON of information out there and everyone has an opinion and thinks their method is the best. There’s options on low carb/high fat, high protein, should you move more or move less, should you count calories or macros…the list goes on and on.

What I have found is that people have the perspective of talking about weight loss or any fitness goal to be similar to talking about money or sex. Hear me out ☺ There are those that simply don’t have enough money or sex and feel completely stressed and crappy about it and those that have a desired amount or feel they have more than enough and are made to feel guilty for being ‘well to do’. When it comes to our weight loss goals – we simply don’t want to talk about it. Why? Because 1) we don’t want others to know that we are insecure 2) we don’t want to be judged for wanting to lose weight or getting healthier or have the worry that we will be judged based on our success or lack of success 3) FEAR!

Fear of putting ourselves completely out there and investing into a program only to not
have success.
Fear of going all in and succeeding only to still be terrified and waiting for the
moment we relapse.
Fear of succeeding and worrying about how people will treat us – do they think we act
differently? Have their opinions of us changed for the worse? And so on.

Here’s the good news y’all – We ALL struggle! We all have a conflicted relationship with working out, with eating healthier and viewing our goals as a ‘diet’ or as a lifestyle. It comes down to ONE thing between the people who succeed and not succeed – which let me say….just because you feel that someone is crushing their health and fitness goals, they may actually think they are not succeeding. We don’t know their goals or what struggles they are having at the moment so while everything may ‘seem’ great and they are totally crushing it…they may be feeling different. Now, back to my thought ☺ That ONE thing that separates the people who succeed from the people who don’t succeed is making a — DECISION! A decision that they make once and for all to confront what’s holding them back known as their fear or LIMITED BELIEF.

Let me give you an example. Up to about six years ago I was a constant yo-yo dieter. I would use food and alcohol in bursts to mask my feelings rather than deal with them because I hated confrontation. I would purchase a workout program, go strong for several days then one rest day would turn into two, three, four, etc. I found that I was leaving my food intake and workouts up to chance because I wasn’t planning what I was going to be eating nor was I scheduling my workouts. Before I would know it, it was meal time and I would grab for the very first thing that I could find because I was starving. Then 9:00PM would come around and I still hadn’t worked out so I would take a ‘rest day’ and say ‘I’ll double up tomorrow’ only that NEVER happened. During this time I also only used the scale to track my progress. By doing this I would allow that number on the scale to control my thoughts and my feelings for the day. Low and behold it would also control if I gorged myself with food or not which if I’m being honest happened often. If I lost a couple of pounds I thought ‘I deserve to treat myself’ but that little treat would turn into a downward spiral. On the flip side, if I gained weight I figured why am I bothering? So again, I would give into food.

During the last six years I have been able to transform my mindset regarding my relationship with food, working out and how I talk to myself. Do I still struggle? Of course but by making that DECISION to confront my fears – my limited belief that I attached to myself I have been able to accept my journey and be at peace with my progress. Now, instead of using food or alcohol to cope with my depression or a stressful day, I use my workouts and personal development. I have found that by eating more nutrient dense food and limiting highly processed foods my brain works better, I have more energy, I sleep better and I’m just happier. Also by setting aside 15 minutes each day to either read or listen to some kind of personal development topic such as how to cope with emotional eating, how to deal with toxic people, how to increase my self confidence I have been able to change the way I speak to myself and others. The other thing that I do is every Sunday I sit down and plan out my meals for the week and which workouts I’ll be doing. I truly believe that being prepared leads to success. Why? Because during the week there’s less thinking. There’s less of a chance to talk myself out eating healthy or getting my workout in. By knowing exactly what I’m eating I can just make it and by knowing exactly which workout I have planned for they day means I can just do it. That doesn’t mean I don’t struggle from time to time but trust me by having all of this planned, it allows me to take a minute or two, have a conversation with myself where I remind myself of my goals and ultimately I decide to crush it. Lastly, I have learned to use the scale as a tool and nothing more. I also started using other tracking methods such as measurements, weekly progress photos, how I feel and how my clothes are fitting. All of that information is just data that we can use to measure our success. We cannot put too much dependency on one of those tools….it’s a tool nothing more!

Here’s the thing, if more of us would take the amount of time that we focus on our fears or our excuses and instead invest that energy and time into DECIDING, COMMITTING & DOING, guess what would happen? We would then be a couple of steps ahead and closer to our overall goals. However, our human instinct is to rationalize, defend and accept our self-imposed limited belief. But here’s the thing, each one of us has the power to CHOOSE and CREATE realities that totally kickass! We each have one shot at being the individuals we deserve to be. Why not be the most happiest, fulfilled human beings we can be?

Here’s my hope…that you really use what I mentioned today to reflect, to tap into your heart and have a new outlook. One that you put into place instead of succumbing to your doubts and fears. The road will be bumpy but along the way you will become stronger and a major ass kicker! And…if you need help, someone to cheer you on or be a support system – I’m here! Me along with an awesome community that I have build to hold myself accountable along with other ladies and men that have decided to make this shift. Now…it’s YOUR turn!

Much 💞,
Jennifer

P.S. If you have made the DECISION to COMMIT and go ALL IN email me at JenniferHepkaFitness@gmail.com and include what you are wanting to achieve along with what you are struggling with. I can get you plugged into the proper virtual community that will help you break away from the limited belief and finally have a STRONG belief in yourself!

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Emotional Eating, General Health

Living with Depression

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These past two weeks have been a difficult one. It’s true, I have learned how to manage my depression but there are times that it’s too much. In case you are new to my blog and haven’t heard my story I’ll share a little background to get you caught up. I have always been a people pleaser. I have always cared what people have thought about me and wanted to be liked by everyone. I was diagnosed with depression in my early twenties after my then fiance for four years told me that he had been cheating on me. Fastforward to my early thirties and I went through an extremely nasty divorce. There have been times when my depression consumes me so much that I have had to cut myself in order to release the built up pain. My depression has lead to a lifetime of self medicating with binge eating to fill the void, frustration and anger, all while on medication.

Two weeks ago I started to feel myself slipping. I was finding that my motivation for working out and eating healthy was non-existent. All I wanted to do was sleep, cry and seclude myself from the rest of the world. My mind is always noisy with to do lists and goals that I want to accomplish however it becomes noisy in a totally different way during these dark times. It becomes filled with self doubt, low self worth, and I find myself comparing my life to those I admire. During these dark moments, rather than focusing on how far I have come in my fitness journey, my career and my life, I focus on what I haven’t accomplished yet. I begin to let the self doubt convice me that I am unworthy of achieving certain goals. The worst part is that I shut out those that mean the most to me. My household becomes a place where my fiance and sons are walking on egg shells around me because they don’t want to set the bomb off within me. For those of you that live with depression, you know exactly what I’m talking about and I think we can all agree that isn’t a great way to live for us or our families.

So, how did I come out of this dark place? I stepped away from social media for several days. My job is heavily focused on social media and I think that is fantastic! I get to meet people of all walks of life, from all over the world. I get to help them with accountability, motivation and provide tips for them to meet their own fitness and health goals. However during this time, I had to step away so that I could stop comparing myself to other individuals in my field and their accomplishments. I needed to remember that everyone has their own story, everyone has started at a different place and just because some people have found success doesn’t mean that my path is wrong. Besides, how on earth could I inspire others when I couldn’t inspire myself? I had to fix my situation.

I then had to increase my personal development. I have always enjoyed reading books that are uplifting and allow me to work on an area of my being or life. I found motivation and inspiration in reading Awaken The Giant Within by Tony Robbins and saving quotes to my phone from Pinterest. I normally write affirmations daily however I began to say them outloud as well so that these became my new thoughts. I started each day with yoga, meditation and journaling as to what kind of day I as going to have. I would end each day with journaling on what I was grateful for and what I had accomplished throughout the day, even if it was something as small as completing my to do list.

The last piece and maybe the most difficult for me was to start working out daily and cleaning up my nutrition. This is the most difficult because when the depression consumes you, you become tired all of the time. Everything hurts from your mind, your soul, your heart and your body. I made it a point to only focus on the current day that I was living. I included working out and logging my food into My Fitness Pal on my to do list. I found this to be helpful since it became a focus point and it allowed me to scratch one more thing off of my to do list…anything that helps, right? I started out slowly by increasing my yoga and then decided to start a new weight lifting program. I decided on the lifting program for two reasons. One, I just didn’t have it in me to do cardio. I was forcing myself to get out of bed every day and I just couldn’t bring myself to jump around my living room. The weight lifting program that I am following combines moves that increase your heart rate so that I’m getting a complete workout which is exactly what I needed. Second, I needed to feel stronger. Lifting makes me feel like a badass and my self esteem needed that. I needed to physically feel that I was becoming stronger which helped my mind and soul to become stronger. I began to incorporate healthy meals again which consisted of healthy fats, protein and lots of veggies. I logged all of my meals into My Fitness Pal to stay in check. At the end of the day, I got to scratch off working out and My Fitness Pal off of my list which may seem small to some but to me, it was a HUGE accomplishment. With every item that I was able to scratch off, I found my spirits lifting and feeling like I was making a difference.

I’m sharing this with you because the next time the darkness overwhelms you, I want you to be able to come out of it. I want you to remember that you are unique and extremely important to this world. I want to help you realize your self worth and even though it may not seem like it at the time, you are meant to do great things! Implement the above steps and I guarantee the darkness will subside and you will be able to start living again.

XoXo,

Jennifer

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